Fashion Police Instructs China’s Police
New rules have come down from China’s Ministry of Public Safety that restrict how fabulous Chinese police officers can look on the job. According to the new fashion and dress code, reported Wednesday by the state newspaper People’s Daily, on duty police officers may not have sideburns, beards, shaved bald heads, long or curly hair, strangely dyed hair and are prohibited from wearing scarves or jewelry or “varnished” nails in public. I haven’t seen too many cops here with curly hair. Furthermore, police officers are not allowed to smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol in public and may not enter “entertainment venues” for personal reasons. Basically, Chinese police cannot share any characteristics with Victor Willis, the cop from the Village People. Victor had long curly hair, sideburns, a beard at times, wore scarves and jewelry and smoked and drank. FYI, Victor was the only straight member of the 70s disco group. The Ministry of Public Safety could have saved everyone a lot of time and energy if instead of writing a long boring document, they published a poster of Victor Willis wrote on it, “if you look anything like this guy or wear anything he’s wearing other than the helmet, you are in violation of the new dress and conduct codes for Chinese police officers.” Even more important than the fact that for a brief period in 1979, Willis dressed up as the second sailor for performances of the hit song “In the Navy,” is that police officers are also banned from wearing colored glasses on the job, “unless there is a specific job need or illness of the eye.” Which really sucks for all those Chinese police officers who like to wear pink and blue shades to work and makes it a double whammy for the Shanghai Whoopi Goldberg Look-alike Police Coalition who already will be forced to cut off the dreads. It’s just a shame that China’s police officers, who might be a bit “out there” with their muttonchops and funky hair, will now have to conform to to the traditional Chinese construct of decorum. The new rules take effect later this month.
•Xinhua: No Dyed Hair, No Jewelry, No Smoking in Public, China’s Police Told