CBS Radio suspended two morning DJs Monday for placing a six-minute prank phone call to a Chinese restaurant laced with anti-Chinese slurs. The call originally aired April 5th, the day after the now infamous Don Imus made his “nappy-headed hos” comment on his own radio show, also owned by CBS Radio. The call was replayed on Thursday, drawing the ire of the Organization of Chinese Americans (OCA), who immediately called for Jeff Vandergrift, the pranker, and his on-air partner Dan Lay to be fired. The two jocks broadcast a daily morning show called “The Dog House with JV and Elvis” on New York’s 92.3 Free FM, the station formerly known as K-Rock.

The call opens with Jeff (JV) asking an unsuspecting Chinese lady if he can get some “Asian food”– the standard straight opening to any good prank phone call. JV then asks the Chinese lady, “should I come to your restaurant so I can see you naked?” In a prank call this is called the “turn”– the point at which the pranker believes he has earned the trust of his subject and therefore can begin the abusive portion of the phone call. Now while the “naked” bit is a solid turn, one must remember, when the subject of the prank is a non-native English speaker, there is little risk involved when the pranker starts being lewd. It’s somewhat cheap.

Then comes the part that really made the OCA’s wok sizzle. JV asks the manager of the restaurant if he can order some “Shrimp Flied Lice.” The old r and l shtick. Now that I live in China, I understand how difficult it is for the Chinese to differentiate between the r and l sounds. I also understand why some Americans find it funny. Apparently, the OCA does not. Vicki Shu Smolin, president of the OCA’s New York chapter said Tuesday, “CBS’s decision to suspend the two hosts is not enough. The hosts will come back and the producer is still working. We demand firing all of them. They don’t think they’re going to get any backlash from the Asian-American community. They’re definitely wrong.” Looks like the OCA is leery, leery pissed.

A few interesting subplots swirl around the suspension of JV and Elvis. The first, and most minor, is how inane the names of these FM radio personalities and their shows have become. Mancow? Bubba the Love Sponge? The Dog House with JV and Elvis? As in, you guys are so wild during your broadcast? Please. And Elvis, your real name is Dan Lay. There is nothing at all about your name that is remotely close to the name Elvis. It’s foolish. The moment Howard Stern left terrestrial radio, FM talk radio began a downward spiral into the depressing, corny medium that it is today. It will never ever again be cool.

Second, the anti-Chinese phone call took place a day after Imus’s comments, but three days before the mainstream media reacted to them. Had the National Association of Black Journalists, Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson not skewered Imus for his insensitive remarks and guilted NBC and CBS into firing him, not one person would have made the slightest fuss over the anti-Chinese prank call. Not a single person. I’d go so far as to say the Organization of Chinese Americans probably wouldn’t have even cared. The OCA is admittedly piggybacking Al Sharpton– testing the power of its community to persuade a major corporation to fire one, or in this case two, of its employees. Like the Imus firing, which became less about Imus and more about Al Sharpton appraising his own cultural value, the Asian community is now testing its ability to bring about a reaction, and at the same time, force America to consider the double-standard it holds with regard to racism.

Which brings me to the third subplot. America possess a flagrant double-standard when it comes to racism. Comments aimed at Asians, Jews, Hispanics, homosexuals and women do not carry the same gravity as comments targeting African-Americans. The mainstream media does not seem to be afraid of Chinese-Americans the way they are of black Americans. People take swipes at Asians all the time– on television, in movies and on radio and no one seems to ever care. Where is Al Sharpton and the rest of America’s “civil rights leaders” denouncing JV and Elvis for their anti-Chinese remarks? Where is the black community speaking out against bigotry that isn’t directly targeting blacks? Why weren’t these two DJs fired immediately by CBS for what was, in my view, a much more offensive racial characterization of an American minority group?

And last, is this what America has come to? The nation that calls itself “the land of the free and the home of the brave?” Every time someone says something improper, they immediately get fired? They have to be banished, never to be heard from again? If JV and Elvis get fired, which I’m willing to bet 1,000RMB they do, it won’t really be a big loss. These guys suck anyhow. But what happens when Bill Maher says “faggot” again. Is he gone? Or when Dave Chappelle says the n-word? Or when Sarah Silverman tells the joke about how getting raped by her doctor was bittersweet for a Jewish girl? Or when Snoop says “bitches ain’t shit but tricks and hos.” Are they all gone? It’s a dangerously slippery slope. A slope that ends at the burial ground for all those who have ever or will ever make a racy joke.

In the meantime, JV and Elvis are suspended without pay indefinitely. JV publicly apologized on Monday’s show. Unfortunately for “The Dog House,” in today’s “don’t forgive and don’t forget” culture, apologies mean nothing. They will be the next two laid to rest at this burial ground for the politically incorrect. And to be fair, this seems like an appropriate resting spot.

JV and Elvis Prank Call - Chinese Food

•NYT: CBS Radio Show Hosts Suspended After Phone Prank
•Xinhua: CBS Suspends Racially Charged Radio Hosts