As Jews around the world prepare for the Passover holiday next week, the chosen people will not only have to forego bread, wheat, rye and all that is leavened. This week, a pro-cannabis advocacy group has added one more item to the unkosher list. Israel’s Green Leaf Party announced Wednesday that in accordance with rabbinical law, Jews would have to quit smoking marijuana for the week of Passover observance. The cannabis plant falls into the kitnyot group of foods that includes peas, corn, beans and rice which Ashkenazic Jews, or Jews of Eastern European descent, refuse to eat during Passover. Michelle Levin (I think I know 4 of those) of the Green Leaf Party said of the pot ban, “Logic dictates that if the rabbis say cannabis is non-kosher for Passover, it is apparently kosher during the rest of the year.” Sounds like pothead logic, but sure. The deeper question is why, in other religions, do the clergymen not have to issue rulings on whether marijuana is acceptable to use during their holy days like Easter and Ramadan? Are there that many Jewish stoners out there? The answer is yes, but the question should be why. Of course, stereotypes have no place on this site, but let’s imagine that Jews were actually like what people who have never met a Jew think they are like. If these stereotypes were true, which again, they’re not, then marijuana is the perfect drug for the stereotypical Jew. For instance, if you’re a Jewish smoker, you have to spend money to buy the pot. Also, the drug enables you to eat more in the event that a mother or a grandmother confuses food for love and shovels more brisket onto your plate after you’re already full. And most of all, in a culture full of gossip, nagging and a wide array of neuroses, pot helps you not care so much about everything around you. Marijuana counteracts pretty much every Jewish stereotype. So to all of my Jewish Flumesday readers who will be giving up bread and pot next week, I wish you well. And if you’re nervous, think about this: when matzah is the only cure for the munchies, what’s the fun in smoking?
•Reuters: No Hash Matzos?