If you’re reading this in China and thinking, “I didn’t even know we had ESPN here,” you’re partially right. ESPN Star Sports, the joint venture between News Corp. and Disney that brings international sports coverage to Asia, has only been available in Chinese hotels with three or more stars and expat compounds. But as of last week, even these foreigner-friendly places will be without the Worldwide Leader in Sports. According to a Variety report Monday, China’s State Administration for Radio, Film and Television decided last week not to renew the contracts for the two networks without giving a reason. An ESPN Star spokesperson said, “ESPN Star Sports is still in the renewal process of its ‘landing rights’ and is actively working to conclude the arrangements.” Variety speculated that the snub has to do with the Chinese government wanting to ensure local Chinese networks retain the rights to soccer matches. Another theory is that SARFT is actively punishing News Corp. for failing to honor the conditions of a 2005 Chinese satellite deal. For the most part, ESPN Star viewers in China watch the networks on illegal Filipino satellite dishes and will not be affected.

•Variety: China Yanks ESPN, Star Sports Permits

Here at Flumesday Stateside we like to tackle the issues that matter most– global warming, racism and now fashion. If you think I’m joking about the import of fashion, think again. As my favorite fashion critic Bruno once said, “Fashion saves more lives than doctors.” That being said, a New York City lawmaker from the Boogie Down Bronx has proposed that weight standards for models and entertainers be written into state law. Assemblyman Jose Rivera believes that anorexia in the fashion world is a “nicht nicht” and seeks to create a state advisory board to recommend weight guidelines for models. While the prevalence of eating disorders has plagued the fashion industry for years, the November death of a Brazilian model who weighed 88 pounds when she died has brought a greater focus on the issue. Rivera said, “New York City is one of the world’s leaders in fashion and entertainment and we don’t want to do anything to harm those industries. At the same time, we need responsible protections in place.” The proposed board would include health experts and fashion industry representatives who would create weight and body mass index requirements for models. I propose a visible rib limit, whereby a model who has more than 6 total ribs visible from a distance of 30 feet would be prohibited from working. This is simple, responsible and doesn’t require models to always be thinking about their weight. Because Lord knows, they have enough to worry about.

•AP: Lawmaker Wants Model Weight Rules
•ABC: Tyra Banks Defends Weight Gain

Monday, James Bond made his official debut in mainland China as “Casino Royale” premiered in Beijing. Remarkably, the newest installment of 007, or as the Chinese call it, “ling ling qi,” is the first of the 21 Bond films to get a license to premiere in China. And when I say premiere, I mean legally and in an actual theater. The bootleg DVD version of the film premiered in wooden boxes on the street over two months ago. Daniel Craig, the latest actor to play James Bond and his “Casino Royale” Bond girl Eva Green made the trip to Beijing for the debut and will appear at Tuesday night’s Shanghai premiere. Craig told reporters at his Beijing hotel, “It’s been an ambition of mine to get here, and I wish I had more time.” You wish you had more time? Come on Bond, what happened to “tomorrow never dies?” While some violence was edited out of the film in the U.S. and in England, oddly China’s State Administration of Radio Film and Television, notorious for censoring foreign films, authorized the film to be shown without any cuts. Craig told the media that a Chinese street DVD vendor tried to sell him a pirated copy for under a dollar. Craig said over the weekend, “It hasn’t premiered here yet, but I think it’s been seen here.” Very perceptive, Mr. Bond. Executives predict that “Casino Royale” will be the highest grossing foreign film in the history of Chinese cinema.

•Reuters: Not Shaken, Not Stirred…and in China for the First Time

A few times a year, China’s Ministry of Labor and Social Security updates the government’s official list of nationally-recognized occupations. As China’s economy transforms itself from rural to manufacturing-based, jobs that were once essential in the old China are no longer necessary. This month, the job of wok repairman was stricken from the official government list. Likewise, in today’s China, many jobs are now necessary that never were before, mostly in the service industry. The occupation of barista (or what people outside of Europe or a Starbucks call “someone who works at Starbucks”) was added to the list this month. As coffee culture has taken hold in Shanghai, the need for qualified baristas has never been greater. Other occupations added to the government list are career consultants, beef graders and jewelry evaluators. As for the wok repairmen– they were a casualty of the stainless steel Chinese cookware revolution. Unlike the old iron frying pans that were always breaking down and made you have to always call the wok repair guy, with the new steel woks, there’s no more wear and tear and forget about that hard-to-clean greasy residue. With the 10 new jobs added to the Ministry’s list this month, there are now 1,979 officially recognized professions in China.

•USA Today: China Says Hello Baristas, So Long Wok Repairmen

Eric Clapton one month, Roger Waters the next. Not too shabby. If only the marketing for these shows matched the talent of the performers. This show, for some reason, is like a big secret. It’s Pink Floyd’s singer for god’s sake, publicize the concert a little bit. Roger Waters is scheduled to take the Shanghai Grand Stage on February 12th as part of his “Dark Side of the Moon” world tour. Waters will perform most of the tracks from Pink Floyd’s famous “Dark Side” album and other of the band’s greatest hits. As the Shanghai Daily reported Friday, Waters has done absolutely no publicity leading up to his China show and the promotion in Shanghai for the Pink Floyd singer, until now, has been totally non-existent. Though promoters announced 2 weeks ago that Waters’ song list had been approved by the Ministry of Culture, the local Shanghai media has been especially slow in broadcasting the details of the event. You’d think that in a city that has only hosted 5 major shows– Elton John, Deep Purple, Black Eyed Peas, Rolling Stones and Eric Clapton (not including Robin Gibb)– a Pink Floyd greatest hits show would garner some attention. Waters’ Shanghai-based concert promoter told AFP, “Everything is ready to go.” He added that not one of Waters’ songs had posed a problem for the censorship police. When the Rolling Stones played the same venue in April, five of their classic songs were banned by the government. Waters, who left Pink Floyd in 1983, reunited with his bandmates for the first time at the Live 8 concert in July of 2005. If the Ministry of Culture decides to make any last minute bans on Pink Floyd songs, here are some selections that could potentially offend Chinese censors: “A Great Day for Freedom” (incendiary), “Any Colour You Like ” (red is the only color here), “Breathe in the Air” (not sound advice in China), and of course, “Another Brick in the Wall” (could be interpreted as trivializing China’s greatest wonder). Tickets are on sale from 280 yuan to 1680 yuan.

•Shanghai Daily: Roger Waters to Play Shanghai Concert

Out of respect for China’s 21 million Muslims, the Party has banned all images and mention of pigs from Chinese television during this lunar new year season. As China welcomes the Year of the Pig on February 18th, the animal has been popping up in all types of Chinese advertising. But in a rare display of religious compassion by the Chinese government, as of this week, pigs are off limits in television ads. This week, the censorship police banned a Nestle ad with a humorous cartoon pig and the tagline, “Happy New Pig Year.” That slogan should have been banned earlier by the stupidity police. CCTV, China’s state television network believes the sight of pigs on television would offend the nation’s Muslim population, who view the pig as a filthy and objectionable animal. The network issued a statement this week saying, “China is a multiethnic country. To show respect for Islam, and upon guidance from higher levels of the government, CCTV will keep any pig images off the screen.” China’s a multiethnic country? In the same way that the U.S. Senate or the NHL is multiracial. The Wall Street Journal pointed out in a story this week that the pig ban came as a complete surprise, as the Chinese government seldom takes into account the concerns of minority groups when forming policy. Perhaps, Beijing’s new year’s resolution is to show more respect to the large and historically oppressed Muslim population of China. The pig is associated with fertility and virility and the next lunar year is considered to be the best baby-making year in the lunar cycle. Hopefully, the television pig ban will not put a damper on all the porking expected to go down in the year to come.

•Sydney Morning Herald: Year of the Bleep

U.S. Senator John McCain told reporters Saturday from the World Economic Forum in Switzerland that it was time China “step up in the world and assume their responsibilities.” He was commenting on China’s inaction over North Korea’s nuclear tests and Beijing’s apparent indifference to a regional proliferation of nuclear weapons. McCain, a Republican presidential frontrunner, said of China, “So far, some of us…have been very disappointed in their lack of maturity.” Beijing officials, in response to the statements, told McCain “I know you are but what am I?” McCain explained to reporters that Beijing has an unmatched influence over Pyongyang and that the Chinese government has an obligation to the world community to act. McCain said, “If China is going to be a superpower…it has to act like a superpower.” To which China responded, “I’m rubber, you’re glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you.”

•AFP: McCain Calls on China to Grow Up

Any American who has lived abroad during the Bush administration knows what it’s like to carry the burden of defending America. Most of the time, I enjoy a good debate about the merits of American policy, pop culture, customs and whatever else. But lately, for obvious reasons, it’s been a little more difficult to sing the praises of the ol’ US of A and I find myself doing more apologizing than anything else. And today is one of those days when as an American I feel the need to say to the world, “I’m sorry, I’m really fucking sorry.” Why, you ask? Well, an ACNielson survey of over 25,000 internet users in 46 different countries found that 13% of Americans have never heard of global warming. I’m embarrassed just writing that. Despite the fact the America contributes to more to the problem than any other country and thus, Americans should know more about this subject than say, Jamaicans, how is it possible that nearly 1 in 7 Americans have never heard of the damn thing? What’s more, only 9% of the world’s population was found to have never heard of global warming which means that America has a higher rate of ignorance toward this issue than the rest of the world. And even more depressing, it means that nearly 40 million people haven’t picked up a newspaper in the last 5 years. Whether or not the issue of global warming is important to you or not, I don’t care. But if you’re filling out an international survey and you’re asked if you’ve heard of something that sounds kind of “smart,” just answer yes. If for no better reason than that it’s us Americans abroad that have to answer for you.

•Reuters: 13% Have Never Heard of Warming

If the Yankees did not have a great enough advantage in signing foreign players, the international reach of the Bronx Bombers has just gotten much bigger. The New York Times reported Friday that a 4-person delegation from the New York Yankees will be visiting Beijing next week to establish ties with China’s baseball league. If you didn’t notice China had a baseball league, it’s okay– the Chinese Baseball Association is not very noticeable. In fact the only time I really noticed Chinese baseball is when the country lost its three World Baseball Classic games last March by a combined score of 40-6. Yankees general manager Brian Cashman along with three other executives– team president Randy Levine, assistant to the general manager George Costanza Jean Afterman and VP for corporate sales Michael Tusiani– will attempt to build a foundation for baseball in mainland China. Yankees GM Brian “The Cash Man” Cashman said, “It’s a country of roughly a billion people that has expressed an interest in the sport of baseball. As we’ve all seen over the years, when China has an interest in a particular sport–and they invest time, effort and money– they typically become very good at that sport.” Which is true as long as the sport doesn’t involve teams. An interesting detail of the New York Times story is its mention that “China” has produced no major leaguers. Meanwhile, Taiwanese Yankees pitcher Chien-Ming Wang was not referenced in the story. Listen, this might be the Times’ way of saying they don’t believe that Taiwan is part of China, but I want to make clear that here at Flumesday, there is one, and only one China (wink). So according to my records, China has, in fact, produced one major leaguer named Chien Ming Wang who started Game 1 of the 2006 ALDS for the Yankees. Just reminding you, especially my Taiwanese readers, that I winked before that last sentence.

•NYT: Seeking Edge in China, Yankees Put Baseball First

Friday marks the one-month anniversary of the Boxing Day earthquake in Taiwan that damaged 6 underwater telecom cables and crippled internet access all over Asia. While some progress has been made in the restoration of Asia’s internet connection, mainland China’s internet has not been restored as promised. Connections to some U.S. sites are still terribly slow, streaming is nearly impossible and as for downloading video, as they say in New York– forget about it.

A day after the earthquake, Beijing promised a speedy recovery assuring China’s web users that everything would be back to normal by January 15th. On January 16th, three weeks after the quake, the China Daily reported that not a single cable had been repaired. The government blamed bad weather and “intricate undersea conditions” for the delay. Intricate undersea conditions? I’d be surprised if the conditions 4,000 meters below sea level were anymore “intricate” than they have been for the last million or so years. With, of course, the exception of some broken fiber-optic cables.

On January 16th, an expert with the repair company Global Marine told the Shanghai Daily that the depth of the cables precluded the application of electrical technology or underwater robots. He said that workers were using “technologies of the 19th century to solve problems of the 21st century.” Reportedly, the men fixing the cables are using grappling hooks at the end of long ropes to drag the seabed for the damaged cables. Again in mid-January, the government said two more weeks.

Though the cables have not been fixed, within the last three weeks, a fair amount of internet traffic has been restored through “alternative channels.” For the most part, the problems that still exist are a slowing of connection speed and an inability to reach certain foreign sites from inside China. The reason for the slowing, according to the January 29 issue of Newsweek, is that the disabled cables have forced data to take alternative routes to reach their desired destination. For instance, an email from Taipei to Shanghai would be rerouted through the United States. Newsweek also reports that the repair job won’t be completed until mid-February.

Imagethief, a popular Beijing-based English blog said of the internet problems, “International websites are still accessible from China, much in the same way that a magazine at the other end of a football field is technically readable if you have binoculars. You can do it with some patience, but it’s a drag turning the page.” The Imagethief blogger informed readers a week ago that the Taiwan earthquake had made the site’s “administration tools very hard to reach.”

Besides the blogosphere, Chinese businesses, especially e-trading companies have been hit especially hard by the internet slowing. A CCTV International survey found that 70% of China’s small businesses claimed to be negatively impacted by the web problems. A People’s Daily article earlier this month reported that Dell China’s online sales were crippled by the earthquake and that MSN, China’s preferred chat tool, was disabled for days. QQ, China’s local chat program which was unaffected by the damaged cables, gained 40,000 new subscribers the day after the earthquake. And worst of all, 10,000 Chinese web businesses lost their domain names as a result of the earthquake.

Strangely, as the writer of CNET’s Little Red Blog points out, the internet problems in China vary based on time and location. While Google’s search engine and email service have worked perfectly for me in Shanghai throughout Asia’s entire web debacle, the writer on CNET’s blog claimed a few days back, “Gmail has been almost useless, and only functions in its simplified HTML format.”

A month after the Taiwan earthquake, internet users in China realize how fragile the web’s infrastructure really is. The way we use the internet nowadays– streaming video, internet telephone calls and multiplayer video gaming– is not what the internet was originally designed for. And as the Chinese divers try to grasp these advanced fiber-optic cables with metal hooks and ropes, it should now be painfully obvious to all, that the technology we create that relies on internet cables does not match the technology of the actual cables.

•Newsweek: The Internet Trembles